-Delighted to share this powerful and totally badass project called Not For You. Shared with permission from the artist, and with some stories from the women who took part. 
*CW: mention of rape and abuse*

Artist Mike Arrison: “”Not For You” grew completely organically. I never imagined or intended for it to be what it is now when I first started. I didn’t even have an idea of it when I first started. It all goes back to my love of the work of Lauren Rinaldi, a painter based in Philadelphia. I had been wanting to collaborate with her for some time, to recreate her paintings as photographs with her as the model, yet our schedules were never able to sync up to one another. Eventually she told me that I could use another model if I wanted, so I didn’t have to put the inspiration on the back burner. Once she told me that I had one major question. “Do I try to find a model that has her exact body type?” And before I even finished that thought, a new one popped up. I didn’t have to focus on just one specific body. I could tie this into my longest running photo project, Reclamation (password: freethenipple) and have this be a statement on female body image. I thought I would be lucky to get three, maybe four of my friends to participate. I would throw it up on instagram, and within a week everyone would forget about. The project has taken over my life since the new year. At last count, (2/15/17) 47 women have participated, ages range from 19-50+, of all sizes, shapes, ethnicities, nationalities, beliefs, so on so forth. Many have shared stories about why they chose to participate and what it means to them. It has been a truly amazing and humbling experience to be able to facilitate the empowerment of so many women through something so simple as a photograph.” 

— I came across this project by artist Ben Hopper called Natural Beauty and loved what the women had to say about their choices around their body hair. Ben has captured their portraits in such a beautiful and striking way, and their words pack a real punch. Shared with permission from Ben. Here are a couple of the photographs, check out the rest at Natural Beauty or his facebook page here ❤ 

*Maya Felix photographed in London as part of Ben Hopper’s “Natural Beauty” project. June 19, 2014.*

“I am mixed race and have quite fair sensitive skin and thick dark hair. This made shaving a very difficult and often painful process. Stubble would always grow back within 24 hours, and trying to shave the stubble would end in bleeding and rashes. My underarms were never ‘pretty’ or ‘feminine’. I hated it and was made miserable by it. I remember wearing t-shirts with sleeves when swimming and jumpers on hot days just to cover up my prickly, irritated pits. I certainly couldn’t afford regular waxing at the age when societal pressure kicked in. I desperately wanted to have skin and hair like my friends and be accepted – not only by them, but also by myself. When I was 15 I even asked my mum for laser hair removal for my birthday (luckily my mum is a badass feminist who has never really conformed to ‘beauty’ standards or bothered with non-essential grooming and firmly said ‘No. your body is beautiful, you don’t need to burn it with lasers’). When I was about 17 and in my first serious relationship with a boy who loved my body a lot more than I did, I decided to try something radical. I decided to stop putting myself through pain, to stop being angry with my body for not being the way I wanted it; I stopped shaving.

I’d like to say I never looked back but I definitely have. I’ve shaved a few times since, normally because I’ve still been unable to shake the ridiculous feeling that I won’t be able to look feminine in a ball gown with armpit hair. I’ve been self-conscious when people glance or whisper or make a comment to me. I’m ashamed to say I’ve apologised to a few people about it, feeling embarrassed and nervous and wanting to make a point of excusing it before anyone else can comment. I have still sometimes covered them up in summer, and definitely made an effort to hide it during my year of working behind a bar. I didn’t think tipsy, overly forward folks (usually men) would withhold comments on them when I reached up to get a wine glass. However, during this year, I was contacted by Ben Hopper, and eventually and slightly cautiously agreed to let him photograph me for his Natural Beauty series. The experience completely changed my feelings towards my armpits and my overall confidence increased massively. The cat was out of the bag to all of my friends and a rather wider audience than I ever imagined (over half a million!!). After reading the comments on the Facebook post I felt proud to be an example of how beautiful women’s bodies are, no matter what they choose to do with them. I felt indignant about the nastier comments, and developed an ‘if you don’t like it, I don’t give a shit because it’s not for you, and your opinion on my or any woman’s body is irrelevant’ attitude. I’ve now realised that underarm hair acts as a really great asshole deterrent – just another reason to love and appreciate it. I do love it now. I may still shave from time to time, just as I may wear lipstick, or dye my hair – but like the latter two, it would be for the sake of personal choice and expression, rather than to conform to a standard I have no interest in upholding or contributing to in any way.

I think everyone should try going without any non-essential grooming at some point in their life. It will shave (pun intended) lots of time off your routine, and it’s really interesting to see what your body naturally does. You may find it freeing and empowering. You may even find that you like the way it looks as I did, and if you don’t you can always just go back to shaving, no harm done.”
– Maya Felix, December 2016.

*Amanda Palmer originally photographed in London as part of Ben Hopper’s research phase of “Natural Beauty” project. April 25, 2010.*

“I realized at one point, when I was about 18, that I was shaving because I’d been doing that told what to do. I can’t remember being ordered to shave my body, but the message was singular and omnipotent when I was 10 years old – YOU WILL SHAVE, IT IS A SIGN OF MATURITY AND WOMANHOOD! It came from my sister, from her friends, from television, from teen magazines, from every corner. And there was no voice, from any corner, telling me NOT to shave (expect maybe my mother, who was horrified that I wanted to shave so early because my sister was doing it). But: I hate being told what to do. So I decided to grow it out and see what happened if I stopped doing what people were telling me to do. And nothing bad happened. So I left it. 

I felt like I was back in control of my body without having realized I’d lost control.

Interestingly, very few people ever made comments about my armpit hair. Children would sometimes stare, and I found myself thinking “How interesting! They have a sense elf what’s ‘normal’ gendered behaviour by the time they’re three years old!” And in the relationship department, it probably attracted more men than it deterred. I was emanating a power and a self-confidence that lots of men (and women, I’m bisexual) found really attractive. I remember my friend Emily, who also didn’t shave her legs, always defending herself against anyone who commented that her leg hair was “gross” by throwing her hands up and saying “I’m still getting laid!!” The most fascinating thing to notice in retrospect is that negative comments and judgements from adults almost always came from women. Men, or at least the kind of interesting, intellectual, hip guys I like to attract, never really seemed to care whether there was hair under my arms or not. But women would sometimes take my armpit hair as a personal insult, like a breaking of an agreement that we are all supposed to groom ourselves according to a standard. Obviously, fuck that.”
– Amanda Palmer, December 2016

I used to be so bothered by not having a flat tummy.
I wanted slimmer thighs and tamer hair.
It wasn’t until last winter that I came to truly appreciate my body.
Once I suddenly lost so much weight I was finally what was considered the ideal size.
But I’d be sitting in the metro, eying curvy women, truly seeing the aesthetic of it.
I love these “love your natural hair and body” movements today, because growing up I never saw anyone famous that looked like me, who I could identity with.
I now realize there are a few things my parents believe(d) that I just brushed off when I was younger, but came to on my own as an adult. But there are a few other things, comments from family about my physical appearance, that did stick with me in a bad way.
I realize no one’s perfect, we’re all just trying our best, but I sometimes ask myself, “if I were a parent, how would I explain that to my child?”
I have a friend who says her family teasing her helped prepare her for the harshness of children at school. I never let that stuff get to me, but when it came from someone I loved and trusted, I listened.
This is something that’s been on my mind for years now and the conclusion I’ve finally come to is this: tell children “The world will judge you for how you look. You can change your appearance if you chose to be perceived differently, but there is -nothing- inherently wrong with the way you naturally are!”

by Wandering Misadventures 

I struggle with a pretty bad case of body image anxiety. I’ve been getting better over recent months, but it’s still a struggle. Sometimes it’s really bad, sometimes I do okay. There are ups and downs. Due to a lack of decent sex education, I didn’t know that I would start to grow body hair as I entered my teen years. When I did, I thought maybe it was some weird anomaly. I was scared for people to see my armpits or legs and especially frightened of anybody ever seeing my pubic hair. But in school, everybody has to get changed together and it’s hard to keep your privacy. At times I was made fun of for being too hairy. At times I was made fun of for being too hairless. I wasn’t doing anything to my body, yet it was still disgusting in the eyes of these other people and in contradictory ways. It really hurt me. At the same time, I was struggling with my weight and with comments about that too, I tried to eat less to lose weight. In the space of a few months I lost five stone and didn’t notice. I was underweight. I hated my body so much.

All the while, I was figuring out my identity. I wanted to be very feminine, but at he same time, being too feminine and not very masculine didn’t feel quite true to my nature. I realised that what I really wanted to be was gender neutral. In many ways, I was very much a woman, but in others, I was very much a man. Realising this, it’s hard to know how to present yourself. Society says men have to look this way and women have to look that way. It makes things very difficult for those who don’t fit into either category.

But though this has been a rather negative piece of writing overall, I’d like to end on a positive. I wholeheartedly agree with the idea of nudism: it reflects a healthy perspective on one’s body and it’s good to see the human body desexualised in a world which is always so keen to sexualise it. The human body is beautiful in all its shapes and sizes. Reading some of the stories here on Project Naked have made me feel a little better about myself. They’ve given me a few more drops of confidence. Below is a picture of my naked body. Yes, I know I’m concealing myself and that it’s blurry and not very good – but that’s not the point. That picture was so hard for me to take. I was shaking as I took it, because I knew I’d be posting it publicly and others would see it.. But the point is, I did do it. While I would say that there are a thousand and one things wrong with my body, I also know, in my heart that I am wrong. I am beautiful just like everybody else. If I can push myself to do this, maybe I can push myself to see the beauty of my body. If you’re struggling with the same thing, I hope you can see your own beauty one day too.

CW: mentions of rape, sexual harassment, sexist language in the context of a critique

‘Feminist: A person who believes in the social, political and economic EQUALITY of the sexes.’

Every morning, I like to start my day by having a quick look on social media. I have a lot of political and science groups on there that always post new articles, and as a sufferer of MS I am also part of a few support groups. But recently, I have noticed an increase in guys posting ignorant/sexist and misogynist memes on there also. Some even post long rants at the absurdity of women campaigning for equal rights, “What about men’s rights?” they argue.

In fairness to them, how can they possibly understand what it’s like to be a woman on a day-to-day basis? How are they expected to understand what it feels like to be talked down to, leered at, judged more harshly and treated differently more-or-less every day? And how can they grasp what it’s like to be female when they can go to a pub/club without any expectation of being harassed, groped… or worse?

I know one friend who was urinated on by a guy on a night out. His response when questioned by a bouncer… ‘She had a dirty face and I thought she might like it’. Myself and nearly all my female friends have been groped so harshly (both bottom and breasts) that they bruised and I know of one friend who lost her mates on a night out and was dragged down an alleyway and raped… she was 17. She hasn’t been to a club since.

Outside of the club scene, two of my mates were raped when they were 13 by men they trusted, another at 15, and another was raped by her boyfriend when she was 21. Oh, and none of these men were held accountable for their actions (lack of evidence, fear of not being believed, invasive medical examinations, recalling the event at the police station and reluctance to go up in court to relive the event again as well as being interrogated and made accountable for their alcohol consumption and/or clothing choice – adding to that the fear of them being found not guilty).

How many men can honestly say they’ve had firsthand experience of any of this? How many of their friends have horror stories of being sexually abused by women? It exists, but nowhere close to the level that women experience it from men; for a woman it’s almost normal.

In the UK today, that is what most women have to put up with. In other areas of the world, the reality of living as a woman is truly terrifying in comparison. Forced marriages (often underage), genital mutilation, breast flattening and in some areas women are murdered or forced into slavery/marriage just for wanting an education!

Therefore, I fully stand by the women’s marches recently. A lot of people have been posting on social media stating ‘it’s a waste of time’ and ‘what about other countries where women are stoned to death or face genital mutilation?’ and one that strikes a particular chord with me: ‘you have equal rights, what are you marching for?’

The western media focused on the inauguration of President Trump as the main reason for the marches (which was the case in America) but most men and women were marching to protest the inequality women face all around the world. Officials reported around 673 marches worldwide, including countries like India, Nigeria, Columbia, Iraq, Ghana, South Africa, South Korea and many, many more. Each country marched to highlight the inequality faced in their respective countries. Some marches also included members of the LGBTQ+ community who are also campaigning for equal rights.

In regards to the other comments, according to western law: yes we (more or less) have equal rights.  But women are still treated very differently to men, whether it’s positive or negative – we just want to be treated equally. We are fed up of some men making inappropriate comments, both in and out of work. We are fed up of being groped by men in clubs, then getting called things like ‘frigid lesbian’ when we kick off about it. We are fed up of being ignored, talked down to, mocked and judged. We are not allowed to be sexual, in the way that men can be. There are a plethora of negative words to describe women who are promiscuous (slag, slut, whore etc.), but how many negative words are used to describe men who sleep around…? None. They are described as a ‘stallion’ or a ‘ladies’ man’ – both with positive connotations.  According to some men, if we complain about being oppressed but wear short skirts occasionally or dance provocatively then we have no right to say we are being oppressed, and some even go as far as to suggest that it’s our own fault when we are assaulted or raped, suggesting that we ‘asked for it’. Their mentality is shocking.

Feminism isn’t all about women. Feminism fights for the equality of ALL PEOPLE. The only reason the focus mainly falls on women’s issues is due to the constant discrimination and injustice of the treatment of women in every country on the planet.

We want to make our voices heard, for ALL women and ALL men. It’s not fair that men are expected to act a certain way. They can’t express how they feel or show emotion because it’s not ‘manly’. They have to conform to a very narrow stereotype in order to avoid ridicule or worse. The biggest reason for male deaths under the age of 40 is suicide. Most men feel like they can’t report abuse and most men are refused the right to see their children as priority goes to the mothers and I don’t agree with that.

I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for some men to navigate themselves in this world, I’m not a man and therefore I’ll never properly understand.

But I can empathise and try… all women want is for men to try and do the same for us.

– by Victoria Lee

This short documentary looks at body hair. Starting off with asking the public for their opinions and to discuss assumptions around women with armpit hair, it moves on to talk with women specifically about their hair choices – some lovely accounts of why women have chosen to not shave and their thoughts and feelings around it. And it features our Hannah as one of the awesome interviewees!

With credit to Camilla Øhren Danielsen for creating this great short film! ❤

A lot can change in 5 years. I have since changed jobs 4 times (with the odd one in between), I have adopted a dog, moved in with a loving boyfriend, and completed/am continuing study in social welfare/counselling/psychology.

Through this study I have learned a lot, and my self awareness and awareness of others has grown considerably.

I have also become so accepting of myself. Of the things that caused me so much hate and anger. Sure, I still have bad days where I feel like my brain has reverted back to my 14-year-old self and it’s fighting against me but instead of counting the bad days and thinking how horrible it is, I now count the good days. I count the days where nothing fantastic happened other than I got to the end of the day without a negative thought. And I sit in my garden and light a cigarette and think “well this is fucking nice, isn’t it.”

I have also been in situations that have challenged me more than I ever knew were possible both physically/mentally, positive and negatively.

I have worked in an environment that had constant physical fights that posed me real physical risk and made me almost vomit when I got home from the sheer thought that some serious damage could have been done. And I realise how strong my body is and how powerful I can be. I have been in situations that required immediate action to prevent myself or someone else physical harm and trusted my body to handle it – and it did.

On the other hand, I have swum naked on one of the most remote beaches in the world, and realised how small and innocent I am in the grand scheme of things. I don’t have to be powerful or strong, I can be small and vulnerable and still feel beautiful.

If I could tell my 16-year-old self anything it would be: “don’t do it just because everyone else is, or that boy wants you to.”

If I could tell my 18-year-old self anything it would be: “you ain’t seen nothing yet, if you think this is good, just wait…”

If I could tell my 20-year-old self anything it would be: “trust me, he’s a good one, just give in and trust him, forget all the fuckboys of the past, you have no idea how well you are doing with your life.”

And I can hear my 23-year-old self now saying: “look at all the things we’ve done! I can’t wait for the rest.”

My 14-year-old self sits and can’t believe how good she will be and how far she would go, she only wishes she could have seen how powerful, sexy, vulnerable, strong, creative, and loved she is. But that’s ok because future me does, and that’s all that matters.

*trigger warning: discussion of mental health issues and self harm*

This is a picture of my thighs. I spent a long time hating them when I was younger.

I’m 26 now. I was 25 when I got my first tattoo – it’s small, simple and took longer than I expected but hurt less. I travelled about 100 miles via train to be tattooed by someone I had studied with at university who was now a tattoo apprentice. I was anxious and the tattoo was of such emotional significance I was worried I would cry, which is why I chose to have it done by somebody I knew – I felt it would be less embarrassing to cry in front of her and easier to explain why. I didn’t cry. I really enjoyed the experience of investing some time and money in such an act of self-love and it was great to catch up with my former course mate. We studied Embroidery together, so she was used to working with sharp needles.

The tattoo itself is of a Sad Ghost – the logo of the Sad Ghost Club, a creative project producing comics about mental health and running workshops and talks. When I discovered the Sad Ghost Club at a comic convention, it was the first time my mental health problems had ever made me feel like part of something positive – being a member of a ‘club’ instead of hiding away my problems feels empowering. I don’t wear my depression like a badge of honour (I talk to most of my friends openly about it but try to avoid discussing it unnecessarily and am wary of who I can trust to discuss it with) but my tattoo reminds me that I’m far from alone. Depression is something I’ve struggled with for a long time and I think it is probably just an inevitable part of my life and part of who I am. Marking my membership of the Sad Ghost Club in a permanent way is a reminder to try and be accepting of, or even embrace, the things I cannot change about myself.

Its position is important too. My tattoo is on the site of some (very faint) scars I am left with as a result of self-harm. I would always self-harm in the same place and my logic was that I would not want to ruin my lovely tattoo by scratching it up. This has worked in a sense but I have had moments of relapse and simply moved over to the other thigh. My plan has always been to get another tattoo there to compliment my Sad Ghost, something I decided as soon as I saw my tattoo in the mirror, before I even left the studio. Whether this will help me stop self-harming, I don’t know. It’s a long and complicated process and this is only a minor part of that. I could just keep moving on until I am covered in tattoos. But the thigh has always been an obvious place for me as it’s so easy to conceal, (when I was younger I would never have dreamed of showing my thighs, even in tights,) it’s easy to cut and so easy to direct your hate towards when you’re a chubby woman.  I hope that once both my thighs are tattooed it will just help me think a little more about what I am doing instead of just having such an easy and automatic place to cut and scratch.

I don’t hate my thighs any more. Since getting my tattoo, I feel that my cute tattoo makes me feel like I have cute thighs. When I don’t have any visible scratch marks on my other thigh, I love the way my Sad Ghost peeks through translucent tights when my skirt is short enough for people to see. I feel guilty that my thighs are basically a punch bag for me when I relapse, as I actually love them for the most part. Then again, they say we always hurt the ones we love.

My thigh tattoo empowers me. It is an acceptance of who I am, it is a celebration of a part of my body I have learned to love, a middle finger to everyone and everything that tells us we are flawed and we should not love ourselves, it is part of my journey, part of my healing and… well, it’s just pretty fucking cool, too.

Anonymous – 26

My body is my fortress. My body is my home.

She carries my thoughts during the day and cradles my dreams at night.

We swim together, learning each other’s secrets while the ocean whispers hers.

We fight together, endless exhaustion where crying shakes us on the bedroom floor.

We love with such fire, racing to catch up with each other.

Once awkward strangers.

My body is my fortress. My body is my home.

But sometimes she must rest.

Kathryn Pearson 

Warning before you scroll – NSFW photo at the end! – Project Naked

I took a naked(ish) selfie and put it on the internet…

… I never thought that I would say that.

I used to be so shy that I couldn’t talk to a group of more than 2 or 3 people without blushing furiously. I would intentionally keep quiet if I thought that too many people would start listening, because I just could not deal with kind of attention.

I am so different now, but I will never forget that freckly little nerd who so badly wanted to speak up, but was too scared.

I realised that being shy was holding me back from all the fun things that I wanted to do. Until one day I thought to myself ‘Fuck it, what would you rather, miss out on all the fun shit and stay quiet, or speak up, occasionally make a twat of yourself, but have fun doing so?’

That shift has helped me to realise that I like life at it’s most ridiculous.

I enjoy saying and doing odd stuff, just because it’s fun, just to see what happens. I like asking questions, having solo adventures, and trying new things, even though I still find it scary and unnerving.

I like awkward situations; they make me laugh.

Which I guess neatly leads us to the naked photo… because sexting is ridiculous and occasionally awkward right?

The naked self-portrait that you see before you was one that a guy that I find to be pretty damn fine asked me for, which is weird for me, because even though I think that I’m beautiful, I still can’t quite wrap my head around the idea that someone else will think that.

Especially if I happen to think that that person is a babe.

Which you know, is a thing that I need to work on, but I’m enjoying this period of self-growth that I’m going through. It’s neat; I’m pushing my boundaries and figuring out who the fuck I am without a guy that I was in a relationship with on and off for nearly a decade.

That man told me that he loved me, and that I was beautiful in all the ways, but when he left I suffered all this self-doubt… He left me for someone else, many other someone else’s… And I couldn’t help but think that I wasn’t good enough, not pretty enough, not sexy enough… I was sure for a while that I must be the one lacking. I have come to realise though, that it wasn’t me, it wasn’t him, it was ‘us’, that just didn’t work.

It’s taken me a while of being by myself to come to the realisation that I like me; I like who I am, and how I look. I don’t need anyone else to validate me.

You are not the first ones to see this photo; I have shown it to a lot of people, I love it. I’m not ashamed of it, or my body, and that makes me really fucking happy.

Shout out to that nerdy kid who was racked with self doubt; it gets better kiddo.

– by “Madam Editor”